OMG claire213

perfectly blending persons smile in darkness--nothing. skin inches away from a horizontal; combative friendship stands still. hands grasp throats, angering the pulse that beats for both. a mutual pass

to whence: i have been writing for about three years and just recently switched this forum. i've kind of adapted a style, and this is very similar to my style, ...

Ah, i like this. Has room for growth though. I think some more line breaks would work wonders for the flow, with more punctuation. in the first stanza, i would ...

This starts quite nicely, with a decent flow. But you lose it at the second line of the 2nd stanza: "The rough-barked trunks groan and sigh like souls weary from ...

words escape behind imperceptible mouths of silver nitrate, pouring, a waterfall of deceit, into an empty sink: a vulnerable mind. transparent promises extend, reaching out, touching the mind. sinful,

Hey... my friend Beckie referred me here, because apparently she loooves it here. So i thought i'd give it a shot because my regular writing forum is pretty... er... well, ...